It's been a great couple of days
Jul. 25th, 2010 09:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
firefly124Friday was a beach day with bluedolfyn (miss you already!) and a couple of other friends. It was rainy, and the water was f&%#ing freezing a little cold, but that totally didn't matter, as we had a blast.
Yesterday was nothing particularly interesting. Today, on the other hand, was the celebration of Kwan Yin's Enlightenment at Chuang Yen Monastery. I always love going there, as it's just such a peaceful place. This is the second time I've made it to one of Her festivals there, which is an entirely different experience to just going and meditating, not least because I literally don't know the language.
Well, much.
I've made several futile attempts to learn at least some basic Mandarin. I pretty much know a couple of key chant phrases (which may actually be in another dialect, this is how clueless I am) and stuff I picked up from Firefly. *facepalm* Non-Latin-based languages can't seem to find hooks to hang themselves on in my brain, at least not when I'm trying to teach myself.
But! Unlike the last time I attended a festival, I arrived a bit early and went to the right hall. One of the staff members who was circulating noticed I was sort of trying to figure out what I was supposed to be doing/where I was supposed to be going and directed me to one of the seats that had (oh, thank Goddess) the liturgy and chants in pinyin as well as characters and English translations as well. The all-character booklets that I saw were gorgeous, but would have been the equivalent of picture books. Since I arrived so late and wasn't able to be seated last time, I don't know if these were available then or are something new, but I was hugely grateful.
There's this weird tension attending this sort of festival. Firstly, I'm not Buddhist, and I don't approach Kwan Yin from a Buddhist perspective, though my path and philosophy are very heavily influenced by Buddhism. Second, I'm not Chinese, don't speak the language, and probably commit dozens of faux pas per minute without any idea I'm doing so. And yet I'm drawn to attend and participate, because I'm either hard-wired or very much programmed to need community worship rather than just solitary practice, even though this means participating in more than one religious community in which I don't entirely fit. Nobody else but me seems to mind any of these things, but I'm always very conscious of being a guest and trying to participate as much as possible while not causing a distraction to others (or, worse, do something outright offensive) as I undoubtedly mess up all over the place. The monk who led the opening invocation and mini-Dharma talk made a point that I took to heart: compassion and wisdom are like wings; you must use both together to fly well. If you want to help someone but do not know how, it can be best to step aside and let someone else with more knowledge do it, lest you make things worse. My personal corrolary of the day: and if you haven't a clue how to pronounce something, shut up before you end up inadvertently saying something obscene in the middle of the lovely chanting.
To the best of my knowledge, I didn't end up accidentally saying anything obscene. At least, neither of the women next to me appeared scandalized. Occasionally amused, which is also distracting and not good, but at least not scandalized. During the break, I went to the gift shop and, with the help of not one but two clerks, managed to locate a CD of the chant that was done and a print version, so that I can make an attempt to improve my pronunciation (and possibly comprehension) between now and next time.
That was something I hadn't noticed the last time: that the men and women were seated separately. Well, the lay men and women. The monks and nuns were mixed together, as were the people in gray garb from the week-long retreat who, so far as I know, are not monks or nuns. Also, there were either fewer children in attendance and running around or I just wasn't aware of them since I was actually in the seats rather than in the periphery.
Bottom line is it was absolutely lovely and very much what I needed. It's a struggle to try and keep the various strands of my path in some sort of balance. The relative closeness of HTAZP and frequency of festivals definitely makes for more emphasis on the Hellenistic side of things, but Kwan Yin is my primary Patroness, and while She's not particularly demanding (or perhaps because She's not particularly demanding), I often find myself dismayed to see that Hellenic emphasis overwhelming my practice. Days like today help add a bit of balance. While it's very theoretical in any case, I tend to think that even if I found a Pagan group focused on Kwan Yin, I'd still need and want to attend these festivals when I can. There's something to be said for tradition, after all.
Compared to my pre-fandom days, I don't post all that much about Pagan stuff lately. I was reminded last night, courtesy of a Pagan behaving badly (Wrong On The Internet doesn't even cover it), both why I don't post about this stuff more often and why I probably should. Because if only the completely out-there types do stuff publically, well, then, that's all anybody outside the various Pagan groups has as a point of reference. That isn't good for anyone. I'm not sure how much my (generally pretty disjointed) blatherings contribute. Several folks on my flist/reading list are far more knowledgeable and experienced, so it's tempting to leave the Posting of Non-Fluffed-Up Non-Whacked-Out Pagany Stuff to them. But doing so means that then there's just Teacher Types and IRAB* Pagans at opposite ends of the spectrum. So, in the interests of filling in the middle hues someplace, I'm thinking to post a bit more of this sort of thing, fwiw. Which may turn out to be good intentions that go nowhere, but August 1 is coming up, so there's the Gratitude Project if nothing else.
*IRAB=I read a book (and thus am now the expert on everything)
bluedolfyn (miss you already!) and a couple of other friends. It was rainy, and the water was Yesterday was nothing particularly interesting. Today, on the other hand, was the celebration of Kwan Yin's Enlightenment at Chuang Yen Monastery. I always love going there, as it's just such a peaceful place. This is the second time I've made it to one of Her festivals there, which is an entirely different experience to just going and meditating, not least because I literally don't know the language.
Well, much.
I've made several futile attempts to learn at least some basic Mandarin. I pretty much know a couple of key chant phrases (which may actually be in another dialect, this is how clueless I am) and stuff I picked up from Firefly. *facepalm* Non-Latin-based languages can't seem to find hooks to hang themselves on in my brain, at least not when I'm trying to teach myself.
But! Unlike the last time I attended a festival, I arrived a bit early and went to the right hall. One of the staff members who was circulating noticed I was sort of trying to figure out what I was supposed to be doing/where I was supposed to be going and directed me to one of the seats that had (oh, thank Goddess) the liturgy and chants in pinyin as well as characters and English translations as well. The all-character booklets that I saw were gorgeous, but would have been the equivalent of picture books. Since I arrived so late and wasn't able to be seated last time, I don't know if these were available then or are something new, but I was hugely grateful.
There's this weird tension attending this sort of festival. Firstly, I'm not Buddhist, and I don't approach Kwan Yin from a Buddhist perspective, though my path and philosophy are very heavily influenced by Buddhism. Second, I'm not Chinese, don't speak the language, and probably commit dozens of faux pas per minute without any idea I'm doing so. And yet I'm drawn to attend and participate, because I'm either hard-wired or very much programmed to need community worship rather than just solitary practice, even though this means participating in more than one religious community in which I don't entirely fit. Nobody else but me seems to mind any of these things, but I'm always very conscious of being a guest and trying to participate as much as possible while not causing a distraction to others (or, worse, do something outright offensive) as I undoubtedly mess up all over the place. The monk who led the opening invocation and mini-Dharma talk made a point that I took to heart: compassion and wisdom are like wings; you must use both together to fly well. If you want to help someone but do not know how, it can be best to step aside and let someone else with more knowledge do it, lest you make things worse. My personal corrolary of the day: and if you haven't a clue how to pronounce something, shut up before you end up inadvertently saying something obscene in the middle of the lovely chanting.
To the best of my knowledge, I didn't end up accidentally saying anything obscene. At least, neither of the women next to me appeared scandalized. Occasionally amused, which is also distracting and not good, but at least not scandalized. During the break, I went to the gift shop and, with the help of not one but two clerks, managed to locate a CD of the chant that was done and a print version, so that I can make an attempt to improve my pronunciation (and possibly comprehension) between now and next time.
That was something I hadn't noticed the last time: that the men and women were seated separately. Well, the lay men and women. The monks and nuns were mixed together, as were the people in gray garb from the week-long retreat who, so far as I know, are not monks or nuns. Also, there were either fewer children in attendance and running around or I just wasn't aware of them since I was actually in the seats rather than in the periphery.
Bottom line is it was absolutely lovely and very much what I needed. It's a struggle to try and keep the various strands of my path in some sort of balance. The relative closeness of HTAZP and frequency of festivals definitely makes for more emphasis on the Hellenistic side of things, but Kwan Yin is my primary Patroness, and while She's not particularly demanding (or perhaps because She's not particularly demanding), I often find myself dismayed to see that Hellenic emphasis overwhelming my practice. Days like today help add a bit of balance. While it's very theoretical in any case, I tend to think that even if I found a Pagan group focused on Kwan Yin, I'd still need and want to attend these festivals when I can. There's something to be said for tradition, after all.
Compared to my pre-fandom days, I don't post all that much about Pagan stuff lately. I was reminded last night, courtesy of a Pagan behaving badly (Wrong On The Internet doesn't even cover it), both why I don't post about this stuff more often and why I probably should. Because if only the completely out-there types do stuff publically, well, then, that's all anybody outside the various Pagan groups has as a point of reference. That isn't good for anyone. I'm not sure how much my (generally pretty disjointed) blatherings contribute. Several folks on my flist/reading list are far more knowledgeable and experienced, so it's tempting to leave the Posting of Non-Fluffed-Up Non-Whacked-Out Pagany Stuff to them. But doing so means that then there's just Teacher Types and IRAB* Pagans at opposite ends of the spectrum. So, in the interests of filling in the middle hues someplace, I'm thinking to post a bit more of this sort of thing, fwiw. Which may turn out to be good intentions that go nowhere, but August 1 is coming up, so there's the Gratitude Project if nothing else.
*IRAB=I read a book (and thus am now the expert on everything)
